SEX DURING DATING AND MARRIAGE

In this article when I talk about sex I mean the intercourse between a man and a woman. The world today has gone so crazy that sexual intercourse is no more honourable and respected as should have been the case. In the more developed countries the level of sexual immoralities is so high that it is really giving cause for concern. I don’t think that there is any religion that supports pre-marital sex, extra marital sex or any form of sexual immorality. When God created the world, He made the first man and woman and kept them in a beautiful garden to keep and maintain it. He also implored them to multiply and fill the world. Sexual intercourse according to Gods original plan is supposed to be a means of procreation. But today what do we find in the world; teenagers, youths, and adolescents engaging in premarital sex without fear of the consequences.  

I don’t want to start discussing at length the extent of sexual abuse and immoralities among out teenagers today because this article is meant for men and matured minds. In this regard, we will be discussing about sex during dating and sex in marriage.

Sex during dating: Call it dating, courtship, friendship, relationship, affair, etc you are right because these words are talking about association between two, mostly male and female. Is sexual intercourse during courtship, friendship or relationship outside marriage right? In a concise and straight forward answer, No. The bible says do not fornicate. In 1st Corinthians 6: 18 the bible says “Run away from sexual immoralities, No other sin affects the body as this one does. For sexual sin is a sin against your own body.” Any sexual affair between unmarried people is fornication. Call it what ever name you may wish to give it, the truth is that if she is not your wife ,my guy you are a fornicator and fornication is sin and not pure before humanity and God. On the other hand the woman that is giving in to a man who is not married to her also is a fornicator. Most men today say they can’t marry a woman whom they are not sure can satisfy them in bed, thus reason for having sexual intercourse with her before marriage. Some say we are courting and we need to know everything about each other to be sure we are compatible. I am not against men getting married to women they are compatible with, but sex is not all that makes a marriage to work after all, you are not getting married to her because of sex alone. Or do you intend to turn her to a sex machine after marriage? Most young ladies have messed up their destinies and future because of the word courting. You give in to a man and he makes love to you, after he tells you, am sorry we are not compatible; I can’t marry you. Meanwhile he has messed up your womanhood and pride as a woman. Remember it is not only that he has messed up your womanhood, he has also led you to sin (fornication) before God.

Extra Marital Sex: This is another common sin that is committed by men and women on daily basis. Bible says its better we abstain from sexual intercourse, but where we cannot, we should get married. It is very common today to see married men and women going outside their matrimonial homes to engage in sexual intercourse with strange men or women. The society abhors this and bible calls it sin (adultery). When you are married and you still go outside your matrimonial home to have sexual intercourse with another man or woman, you are an adulterer. Another common one these days is the case of married men having sexual relationships with young and unmarried ladies. She calls you her sugar daddy or Aristo and you are happy. In this case the man is an adulterer while the young lady is a fornicator and neither the society nor God condones this. On another hand you see married women dating young boys who are young enough to be their sons and are happy to talk about it openly. She calls her self sugar mummy and the young man her Gigolo. I pity the young man who does that because he is inviting the rage of God to himself. Proverbs 6 verse 27 to 29 says “Can a man scoop fire into his lap and not be burned? Can he walk on hot coal and not blister his feet? So it is with the man who sleeps with another man’s wife. He who embraces her will not go unpunished.”

Sex in Marriage: God ordained marriage and is totally in support of the marriage institution. Like I said earlier, God created man and woman and gave them dominion over everything in the world as well as to procreate and multiply the world. Sexual intercourse in marriage is the means through which Gods charge for procreation is being carried out. Also in 1st Corinthians 7:3 the bible encourages sex in marriage and clearly states “The husband should not deprive his wife of sexual intimacy which is her right as a married woman, nor should the wife deprive her husband.”  Sexual intercourse is for married men and women and every religion supports this. I don’t think that there is any society also that does not believe in this. The couple should try and make themselves available to satisfy each others sexual urges to avoid temptation. Sex is not food that we eat on daily basis, in this regard men should not turn their wives into sex machines either. Most men who are into adultery always give that as an excuse. My wife is not always ready for me when I need her. You have to understand your wife and know when best she will be in the mood. Going outside to get involved in extra marital sex is sin and God detests that. I wish every married man happy married life and encourage all unmarried men to try as much as possible to abstain from sex until they get married to be at peace with their creator.