Being poor is a good way to increase your chances of being hurt by your parents, is not an accurate statement. It is about not having love but fearful parents and a fearful environment. It is their survival not to own their reality and they pass it on. They project their hurt on to the people, children and others around them. Unwittingly, I was attracted to this mentality because I was raised in it and it was familiar. I married this mindset because I now know that there is a universal law that “Like attracts Like.”
Only the people can change themselves. Laws do not stop domestic violence. I was raised in domestic violence and incest since childhood and was married for 30 years in domestic violence and rape while teaching school. Today I have become a mature, rational, and compassionate adult. After suicide attempts and his several tries to kill me besides the other attacks and stranglings, I had to wake up to my playing the victim in a passive aggressive game. My guilt attracted punishment, but I cried “poor me”. This soul level of co-dependency was killing me or he was going to murder me.
With many years of changing myself with self-love, releasing my fears, guilt and anger that I learned in childhood, and finding a Higher Power to love me with unconditional love, I transformed myself into rising above the lower energies of fear, guilt and shame.
I am in a relationship of over 12 years of unconditional love, today. I have been blessed.
Domestic violence is a wake up call to love yourself and send love to others. When you take responsibility for your life, you do not look to others for validation, love, finances, or self-esteem. You mature into a person who is accountable and takes on an adult consciousness. It teaches you to find your own inner power to live the life of who you really are.
My immaturity from being terrorized by seeing my father beat my mother, at the age of three would no longer be the basis for my life. The tools for emotional growth out of fear, guilt, and shame into the love that is within will help anyone grow into love, self-esteem and peace. I cannot change others, but I could change myself. Then my life changed around me. My story is related in my latest book, “Paradigm Busters, Revealing the Real You” which guides the reader for outgrowing and releasing the past through forgiveness and compassion. There is a way to a better life style, I found it.