As a native English speaker, I can say with a hand on my heart that my grammar is crap. I was never taught the inner workings of my language until I was forced to in order to attain an English teaching certificate. Now, I can’t get enough of the scientific dissection of the language; but on the other hand, sometimes, as we all know, rules just don’t add up. From experience, the UK is one of the only European countries that does not include grammar in the educational syllabus; imagine, almost 70 million people talking with loose tongues. What does this mean? Maybe, just maybe, this might be one of the keys to unlocking the mystery of the apparent chaos we are experiencing in the UK at present.
The English language is a world business. And we’re talking big money. All over the world, from Russia to the United States, there are millions of people learning English, oftentimes using English Language textbooks that are not always published by native English speaking companies. Due to their grammatical nature, these books do not help the learner with ‘natural language,’ but instead favour Cambridge-style English which can be rigid, and overly-academic. Nevertheless, Cambridge seems to love it and so does everyone else who can cash in on the language boom.
In Greece, it is common knowledge that the only way to get a ‘good job’ is to get an English Language Certificate. As a result, a majority of students finish school at around 2pm, and then attend about 3 hours of English Language classes where they are pummelled with grammar, vocabulary, writing, listening and speaking. THey complete exercises that not even a native speaker is capable of without the necessary training. These guys know our language better than we do. Is it any wonder, then, that people all over Europe look at the English with such contempt? They can’t understand a word us tourists say anyway ever since we choked BBC English in the throat. We are no longer the guardians of our own language. They are.
But what does this tell us about England today? Well, in contrast to European English, there is neither reign nor constraint over the way the language is being used here, reflecting the chaotic world of our growing cities and the cultural mash up that is our island. But no need to worry, those of you who do; it seems that business English will always maintain Cambridge correctness as it is in global trade and communications that academic English works best. But on our city streets, something very special is happening. Watch Kidulthood, listen to Kano, Dizzee Rascal, M.I.A or any other exceptionally talented home-grown or home-adopted lyricists. This is how a majority of London kids speak nowadays; gloriously incorrect and poetically charged. Oh my days, it’s a new beginning.
Our language is morphing into something completely different, and with it, Old England will fall into the past; unless of course you’re a foreign student sitting the Cambridge English Language exams. This is not a bad thing. Language has always been in flux. Despite the rules of grammar, one of the fundamental things we always forget about spoken language is that it never stays still nor does it stay the same for long. And, as history constantly illustrates, it is the movements of the underground that shape the future; look how black music and culture affected America and the world.
Where our new and developing city vernacular will take us, we can’t be sure. It might be frightening, but one thing is certain. In a country where people are judged by the way they speak and where language keeps the class system alive, I say good riddance to Proper talk. We have language, let’s play with it.
Those European students better ask for their money back.