Have you ever had a teenager ask, “How to break-up in a relationship without insulting the other person?” In my opinion, I’d have to reply, “This is a complicated situation and a person requires a solid plan before breaking it off with a partner. Every person has a right to break-up with a person if they do not enjoy them as a partner and there’s definitely no spark there; nonetheless, it must be done in a professional manner.”
The person may have a great personality and is likeable but you enjoy them only as a friend and there’s nothing more than a friendship and you want to move on and release them from thinking there’s going to eventually be a “love” connection in the near future.
It’s my opinion that a person should never lead someone on and cause them to believe there is a “love” connection when there is not and there probably will never be. This may cause a person to build-up in their mind a relationship of love and eternal happiness when it is nothing more than a friendship. This is truly wrong and it should never be allowed to go forward.
Years ago when I was dating, I often found myself, time and time again, accepting another dinner, another night out on the town, and keeping the person I was dating happy and not wanting to hurt them. I was totally wrong. I would continue to go out with them but I was miserable; and I’d ask myself, “Who is the person really hurting here; why of course it was me, the person leading the person on and causing them to believe I really cared about them?”
A person must face it and admit that the relationship is not a relationship unless both people are into it. Why allow something to brew that is completely false?
People must go out with a person before they decide if they like them or not but if there’s “no” connection quit accepting dates and move on in life. If you’ve decided you no longer care to go out with them, select a nice setting to have a real talk with them and explain that you love their friendship but that’s as far as you want to go with the relationship. You’d like to keep them as a close friend because you’ve built a close bond as friends. It is your invite to meet and if a meal was eaten, it’s you’re responsibility to pick up the tab.
Some men will automatically get mad and walk out without allowing them to continue the discussion, but remember; you were up front with them and told them how you felt about the relationship and you did not allow it to drag on. When you see them in the halls at school or in other activities continue to display that friendship and they’ll come around in time.
They’ll see the sincerity in your face and that you are passionate about your friendship with them; and they’ll know it was the right thing to do by not carrying on the dating game situation when it would end up hurting worse in the end.
I’ve seen many men display a “get even revenge” by starting some terrible gossip about the person they had been dating and who was honest with them; be prepared and ignore it…it will eventually go away in a matter of time and your life will get back to normal. It’s wise to “never” lead a person on because it can be hurtful, embarrassing, and cruel; and many people will leave feeling they’ve been used.
Barbara Kasey Smith is the writer of this article and it is based on her own opinion and not that of another person.