Is it my opinion only or do other people agree that there is a problem in many marital relationships in our society today because a couple’s love slowly slips away and their relationship becomes a total martial mess and a divorce knocks at their door? Oft times, men and women live two totally different lifestyles because of their jobs and they’re pulled apart from each other until they become strangers. They find themselves not sharing, communicating or expressing love to their mates and they end up as total strangers.
Is this just me or do you see it in your daily walk too? It saddens me because people cannot see that their lack of communications and expressions of love is ruining their married lives. I understand why there are so many divorces because any woman/man who feels left out, unloved or cared about will crave a closer relationship with their partner or start looking for someone to share their life with. I do believe this is why some people start looking for love in all the wrong places, and they become involved with another partner because the closeness of having a person to talk to and to share their life with is gone and they feel alone and frightened.
Marriage is not a flimsy contract between two people but it’s built on two people’s oaths to each other. People who have a lot of issues that cannot be resolved in their marriages will begin to find themselves going in various different directions exploring to find someone to listen and to hear them out. They find they no longer have anything in common with their mate and they begin to miss a close relationship and someone who will listen and respond to them in their life. It’s my belief that when two people start going their own separate ways, they’re headed for serious trouble in their marriage and they had better take heed of all of their actions.
When a married couple does not communicate, display affections, and stops to listen to what their mate has to say; they’re looking straight in the face of a breakdown in their marriage. A mate is going to begin to feel neglected, unloved and ignored because they believe their mate does not care what they have to say or do…so why bother? They begin to find there’s emptiness in their life and marriage and they want out. Have you ever noticed when people lose respect for their partner, love starts to disappear too?
Whenever a person is mentally or physically abused by their partner, they lose respect for them, and as far as I’m concerned, once respect is gone, there is nothing left. It’s my own opinion that love doesn’t have a place in a mind for any type of neglect, misery, slaps in the face, name callings, lying, cheating, dishonesty, etc. True love in my opinion is supposed to be unconditional and it is supposed to withstand all the storms that comes against it. Love is respect, kindness, honesty, giving, sharing, and consideration, showing affection, and committing oneself to their partner.
Love can also falter when a man/woman abuses drugs, alcohol, gambling, cheating, lying, and other things to cause mayhem in their marriage. People who abuse any of these things does not function or think properly and cannot be honest and truthful in a marriage. These factors equal divorce! People can keep their love from waning and dying in their marriage if they practice nurturing each other’s needs, communicating, displaying affections, and saying, “I love you”, listening and hearing their mates concerns, appreciating their mates desires and views, and being interested in their mate at all time. Love is putting a mate first and foremost in their marriage.
It’s my opinion that love will not diminish when there are excitements, love affections, communications, companionships, and actions displayed by both people throughout a marriage. Love waits to be nurtured and displayed at important moments in a marriage and it’s needed to keep the spontaneity alive and guessing. People should never take love for granted; and if they do, they’ll find it waning.
Barbara Kasey Smith is the sole writer of this article; it’s based on Barbara’s experiences in life.