OK, I have to admit it: I can be a bit slow. I didn’t get it till today, even with the evidence mounting higher than a pile of Alaska earmarks. I’d often wondered, in recent months, why Bush, who has so maimed the Constitution, did not simply scrap it altogether and continue his reign of ignorance by changing the White House locks and refusing to budge on Jan. 20.
Then, like a thunderbolt, it hit me. He is trying to stay on.
Think about it: have you ever seen our “president” and Sarah Palin together? I did a Google-image search. Nothing. The literal-minded, lacking the imagination to see just how brazen these people are, would probably trot out the old theory that Bush, wildly unpopular, would be a distraction, or worse, on the campaign trail. How naïve. Because the truth, clearly, is that Bush and Palin are the same person.
Ridiculous? Not at all. You can do practically anything these days with digital image manipulation and makeup. His puppeteers have merely employed the latest technology, added a little – if you’ll pardon the expression – lipstick, and the rest is comic political history.
Still a doubter? Just compare their resumes, item by item.
Ignorant? Check.
Stubborn? Check.
Ethically challenged? Check.
Prizes loyalty above all else? Check.
Makes abortion the ultimate issue? Check.
Wants to be seen as one the guys (or gals)? Check.
In speeches and debates, relies on meaningless catchwords (remember “compassionate conservative”?) instead of actual thought? Check.
And there you have it: Bush’s plan to get back to the White House as soon as McCain resigns in mid-February, to spend more time with his houses. This agreement was all part of McCain’s plea bargain to avoid prosecution for his deregulatory crimes, but that’s another story. And Bush did not think all this up, of course; it was Cheney’s idea. He’ll be staying on as White House “chef.”
Wait: What about Palin’s comically incoherent answers in the Couric interviews? Even Bush, at his most inept, has never been that bad. Well, there are still bugs in the voice-altering software. Some wires got crossed. But they’re working on it.
And what about the rest of the “Palins”? Oh you can get those easily from Rent-a-Christian-Right-Family.
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