Of course, we as parents were raised with behavioral expectations in the school setting. We were told the importance of saying thank you, sitting still in class, listening to the teacher, raising your hand, taking your turn, handing in your homework on time, and participating in class.
The view of course is that all of this can be controlled by the child. And the parent certainly has a lot of impact on the success of this positive behavior.
Now, let’s examine the diagnosis of Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder. Here is a biological, medical diagnosis that affects the wiring of the brain, chemical presence in the nerve synapses, and underdevelopment of the frontal lobe of the brain.
All of these are causative factors for the key symptoms of ADHD: hyperactivity, inattention, and impulsivity. Behavior in a child with ADHD can many times be a real impairment to success in academics and social success.
Certainly it can be managed, but parents and teachers alike need to understand ADHD in order to understand how important certain factors are in helping a child to maintain the behavior that is needed in school.
Structure and positive reinforcement are two areas that come into play. Of course, every child is different and their issues will guide the behavior plan that needs to be put in place.
I have heard countless stories where the behavior of the child has been directly blamed on the parent. Without proper information, the parent will be made to feel guilty, inadequate, and perhaps angry at the child who is causing their embarrassment. The other scary thing about this is that apparently the school then is not taking any responsibility for this behavior.
The parent and school must become a team with support in place and communication ongoing. If the school personnel are refusing to look at this diagnosis and be aware of how different these kids must be dealt with, then it falls on the shoulder of the parent to learn and advocate for her child. Statistics are pretty scary.
One third of children diagnosed with ADHD (not including of course the countless kids who are not) do not graduate from high school. One way to turn this around would be to strongly advocate for our smart, wired differently kids so that they can self-advocate and be successful.
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